Health food stores make me feel guilty. The free-range poultry. The dairy-free gravy. Do you know how many closed-range chickens I’ve eaten in my lifetime? I’m like the Hitler of poultry eaters. Asking for a plastic bag when I check out makes me feel guilty. I could fit my tofu jerky, half a dozen eggs (free-range), and protein crumbles in my pockets, but a plastic bag is so much easier.