I’m so ready for a new bike. I can’t seem to get the Pivot 5.7 off my mind ever since bounding down the Wasatch Mountains of Utah. Although it would be so sad to sell my bike and buy a new one only to learn that it was the magic of the Wasatch Mountains that made my ride so sweet.

Instead of dropping thousands of nonexistent dollars, I brought my Stumphumper to the shop for an overhaul. It’s back to being a Stumpjumper now. It was easier spending hundreds of dollars on new components and a helpful mechanic.

The last ride I took made me wish I had a singlespeed since I couldn’t use any of my gears anyway. At least with a singlespeed I don’t keep thinking that I can’t make it up the hill without several gear choices.

My cables and housing were so mucked up and the cassette so clapped out that my favorite gears were completely inaccessible. I’m sure you can guess that means my granny gear, and the two leading down to it, were gone. Not only did that make my climb up Inglesfield Gap excruciating, but it made me keep trying to mash the shifters into those gears with the hopes that something might change. In case you too are tempted to behave this way, it’s a far worse choice than just grinding up the mountain in a bigger ring. All it did is hurt my thumb and cause the chain to slip back and forth between gears with a loud “cachunk!” every time I stood up in the pedals. I’m certain this led to the demise of my chain. That’s not all that was demolished. The mechanic said that the middle ring practically fell off on its own when she was evaluating whether it needed replacement.

My descents were no better. I had to use the heel of my hand to force the shifter into giving me the big ring on the flats and down hills. This maneuver would coincide with my front wheel dabbing into a gully or meeting with a rock throwing me gracefully off trail. By the way, none of these tactics offered a flow to my ride. At least I was no longer riding on the shredded seat, which had been missing the padding for my left butt cheek. Who needs to sit anyway? I finally traded it out for an old one that I pulled out of the rubble from the box of old bike parts.