The Lolly Gaggers Guide to Triathlon Training

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Lauren & Gracie Dog, not being athletic
Gracie and Lauren being sleepy and not athletic

Runners World says if you are fit you can train for a triathlon in 6 weeks. No really, read the article.

There is a website for beginner triathletes that provides free coaching and online training logs.

Another website has a very handy 93 page training schedule for folks wanting to complete their first sprint triathlon.

I have read all the articles, browsed books that were left on my bed side table by the triathlon fairy, and even fleetingly considered a training log. But there is one little problem. None, and I mean not one single resource accounts for the fact that I am a wuss and sometimes don’t want to bike, swim or run in a given day.

I am a soft core athlete. Often my motivation to exercise is the extra snacks I will get to have later. Yes, I feel better when I am done. Yes, I like being fit. Yes, I know it is good for me… but so is sitting in a hammock and reading a good book. Are you with me?

So when I decided to “train” for my first triathlon (the Patriot Triathlon in Williamsburg Virginia Sept 11 – 12, 2010), I knew it would be on my terms. And what are those terms? I am not totally sure.

I can run a 5k.

I can swim for a long time.

I can tolerate a 16-20 mile bike although there will be some complaining on the way.

Oh, more importantly, I am stubborn, and sometimes lazy and am frankly shocked that no one in my shoes has apparently ever tried one of these races.

When I googled “lolly gagger triathlon” all I got were blogs by actual jocks who were commenting on how they were not lolly gaggers.

There is nothing out there for someone like me. So, I will chart my own course as the say.

Training schedule: Do stuff, as much as a I feel like it for as long as I can.

Nutrition: I am mostly vegan so I think I will be ok.

Cross Training: Yes. Yoga and dog walking count, right?

Race day goals: Not to walk or drown.

If you too want to be a lolly gagger and train for a sprint triathlon, good luck. My only advice is have fun. If you want to keep up with my lack of training, or general athletic laziness, you can follow my tri-blog. If you are a real athlete, I totally encourage you to read. I will make you feel much better about your purposeful training and skills.


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